


falling in love with you again

by suspendrs



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Cuddling, Drabble, Established Relationship, Fluff, I'm Sorry, M/M, like go see a dentist after reading this, like tooth-rotting, there's absolutely no plot to this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-19
Updated: 2016-08-19
Packaged: 2018-08-09 19:31:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,118
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7814326
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/suspendrs/pseuds/suspendrs
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>Harry is just so fucking cute, Louis can’t stand it sometimes, can’t understand how he got so lucky. His heart is doing backflips and all Louis can do is press even closer and cuddle Harry into his chest, burying his smile into his hair.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He can’t remember a time when he loved this boy any more than he does right now at this very moment. He also knows for sure, though, that he’s never loved him any less.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Or, three times in which Louis fell in love with Harry all over again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	falling in love with you again

**Author's Note:**

> story time: the other day Lena texted me and asked me very nicely to listen to this album i'd never heard of and, if i liked it, write something inspired by it. so that very night i sat down and listened to the whole album and this little thing is what came of it. I have multiple other ideas for other songs off the album but this was my favorite, so here it is. based on Falling In Love With You Again by Imelda May, which I recommend listening to before/while you read. 
> 
> [song](https://open.spotify.com/track/2B6kmHMDZu0athCzheUsVQ) || [album](https://open.spotify.com/album/16s0XOdNFDoBnhY81QYY3H)

The bruise on the inside of Louis’s thigh is smarting where it’s pressed against the mattress, but there’s really nothing he can do about it. Harry is a dead weight with his stupidly heavy arm thrown over Louis’s shoulders and Louis would rather die than disrupt his peaceful slumber, would rather suffer a thousand thigh bruises than miss one little flutter of Harry’s heavy eyelids.

Things are still so new between them, though it feels like they’ve known each other forever. Louis’s only known this boy for about a year, but he’s loved him almost as long, and he’s lived with him for a few months now. They’re both so young, is the thing, but Louis is sure that this is forever. This bright eyed, curly little thing is never getting away from Louis, but Louis knows good and well that he’ll never want to, anyway.

Harry made dinner for them earlier in their kitchen, that’s _theirs_ and not anybody else’s. They ate together at _their_ dining table in _their_ kitchen and then they did the washing up together at _their_ kitchen sink. Everything’s still shiny and new and yet to be experienced, and it’s all _theirs_.

After dinner, they moved to the living room, and for all Louis whined and complained, Harry wouldn’t let him sit. He plugged his phone into the shit speaker system set up in the corner and then pulled Louis in to dance, forcing him to tuck his head under his chin. Harry’s hardly an inch taller than him now but he won’t let him forget it, much to Louis’s dismay.

In a world which they’re rapidly discovering doesn’t want them, it felt so nice to be there, just there, in Harry’s arms and tucked under his chin. It felt so nice to move around the room like a couple of grannies on a dance floor, to have nothing to do and nowhere to be and no one to look good for. For once since all this madness began, there weren’t a single pair of prying eyes on them, not a single person looking to uncover every secret they have to keep.

It was nice, until Harry got cocky. Somewhere between one song and the next Harry got a bit cheeky, hands slipping from Louis’s waist to his arse and pulling their hips together. There was nothing sexy about it, nothing sexy at all, all giggles muffled into Harry’s collarbone and dimples pressed into Louis’s hair. Harry went for a dip and Louis’s entire world tipped upside down, his inner thigh catching the very corner of the coffee table as he went down.

He was laughing before he even hit the ground, and in the split second it took Harry to follow him, and even when he opened his eyes to see Harry’s worried ones looking back at him. Harry’s concern quickly melted to amusement as well and they swallowed each other’s laughter, lips pressed together in the ugliest excuse for a kiss Louis has ever been a part of.

“Are you okay?” Harry mused, pulling back to look him over with a hint of a smile on his lips.

“Hit my leg,” Louis hummed, still grinning, even as Harry smoothed his hand down the length of his thigh to find the point of injury.

“Will you survive?” Harry said, meeting his eyes again, his smile growing.

“Don’t think so,” Louis sighed, but he couldn’t stop giggling, even still. “Don’t invite Liam to my funeral.”

Harry laughed one of his obnoxious, honking laughs, nuzzling his nose against Louis’s. “Shush, you love Liam.”

“I love you,” Louis argued, sneaking a hand up the back of Harry’s t-shirt. “Liam, however, is very slowly growing on me.”

“Let’s not talk about Liam right now,” Harry murmured, meeting his lips again slowly. They didn’t move very far for the next few hours, and Harry’s phone ran out of battery somewhere in the middle of it all, but the silence couldn’t take away from how good it felt to be Harry’s right then.

So here they are, cuddled up in bed, and Harry’s snoring and Louis’s wondering how long his bruise is going to keep aching. He’s on his stomach with his legs sprawled out, and Harry’s in the same position beside him, except Harry’s got an arm over Louis’s shoulders and a knee over his leg, pressing his bruise steadily into the bed.

Louis sneaks his arm up under Harry’s, reaching out to poke at the curl that’s drooping over Harry’s eyes. Harry twitches in his sleep and Louis grins, gently brushing the curl up and out of his face.

Harry grunts and shifts, shuffling closer to Louis under the covers and smothering him further under his lanky, heavy limbs. His head is resting mostly on Louis’s pillow, their faces close enough that they’re breathing the same air. Louis grins as Harry puffs out a breath right against his lips, tipping his head forward a bit to nuzzle their noses.

Harry whimpers quietly and smiles, just a twitch of his lips. Louis grins, doing it again just to see the way Harry wrinkles his nose and huffs.

Louis is so endeared, can’t help but snake his arm around Harry’s waist and hold him even closer. His heart is burning in his chest in the best way, in the way that means somehow he’s falling just a little bit more in love with this stupid, weird boy.

He thinks back to when they met, how clumsy and awkward and hopeful they both were, especially Harry. Maybe Louis didn’t know in that instance that he was going to fall in love with this dumb, scrawny, chubby-cheeked boy every day for the rest of his life, but he knew right away that he was something special.

Harry mumbles something under his breath, something about cheese, Louis thinks, and Louis feels like his heart bursts right out of his chest in adoration. Harry is just so fucking cute, Louis can’t stand it sometimes, can’t understand how he got so lucky. His heart is doing backflips and all Louis can do is press even closer and cuddle Harry into his chest, burying his smile into his hair.

He can’t remember a time when he loved this boy any more than he does right now at this very moment. He also knows for sure, though, that he’s never loved him any less. Harry keeps murmuring things in his sleep and Louis listens to him until he drifts off as well, his heart so stuffed full with love that he’s not sure it’ll be able to keep beating until morning.

-

Germany is beautiful. They’ve been to three different cities in five days and played so many shows that they’re all starting to blend together, but from what Louis’s been able to gather from out the windows of the tour bus, it’s a lovely country.

They’re touring their second album, which is insane. Louis never really thought he’d even have one album out, but now he has _two_ , and he’s traveling the world performing it with his best friends. It’s a dream come true, even if it sucks sometimes, like when they’re stuck on the bus for days at a time, or when he can’t even look at Harry in public without being reprimanded.

It’s hard, being away from him for any amount of time. Even with just three people between them in the middle of an interview Louis feels empty, hands itching to feel Harry’s skin, even for just a second. As time has gone on their management has gotten more and more strict about how they act around each other, and Louis’s afraid that soon enough he won’t even be able to acknowledge Harry’s existence when there's people around to see.

It’s not that Louis’s afraid of coming out, or Harry. Apparently, it’d be bad for their image, though, as a band, and it’s just too early in their careers to make such a risky move. They’ll be able to come out someday, though, they’re told. Maybe when it starts to die down a bit, the fame. Louis’s sure it won’t be longer than a few more years, at most.

They’re on the bus at the moment, traveling to the next city for the next show. They have the night off, which is nice, because it’s been _go go go_ for nearly a week and they’re all just about dead on their feet. 

Zayn buggered off a while ago to have a nap in his bunk, and the rest of them have been trading off the two PlayStation controllers for about an hour. Harry’s off in the kitchen making everyone a cuppa and Louis is watching a rather dull FIFA match between Liam and Niall, and it’s kind of raining lightly against the window of the bus and Louis wants to sleep for a year, at least.

Niall’s feet fucking stink, though, and Louis is too cold to nod off. Harry is taking absolutely forever in the kitchen and Louis is two seconds from crying if he doesn’t get his cuddly boyfriend and his warm tea right the fuck now. 

Liam makes a goal and cheers quietly for himself, even as Niall kicks at him with his socked, noxious feet. Louis burrows into the corner of the sofa and watches Harry’s back as he pours the water from the kettle into four mugs, averting his eyes back to the telly just as Harry finally turns around with all four mugs clutched in his massive hands.

Niall says something when Harry hands over his tea, but Louis doesn’t listen. Harry hands Louis his tea without looking at him and then sits right down next to him, taking his free hand in his own while he assures Niall he made his tea exactly right.

It’s such a natural motion, is all, the way Harry’s hand instantly seeks out Louis’s. They’ve been together nearly three years now, Louis should be over the butterflies, but dammit, he’s not.

He can feel himself smiling as he watches their hands, watches the way Harry’s thumb swipes so carefully over the back of his hand. Harry’s still not even paying attention to him but Louis feels like the happiest guy on earth, because no matter who Harry’s talking to or what he’s doing, he’ll always come back to Louis, and Louis knows it’s just the same the other way around.

He can’t help himself when he squeezes Harry’s hand quite hard, overcome with affection suddenly. Harry hardly glances at him but Louis feels himself light up from head to toe, his smile getting just a fraction brighter.

“Lou,” Niall scoffs, peeking at him around Harry’s body. “You good? Need a private moment?”

Harry looks at him then, properly, holding his eyes for a beat longer than he probably should. His smile spreads slow like honey and Louis wants to kiss him, but he refrains, because Niall’s stinky feet are a weapon he knows how to use well.

Harry pulls Louis’s hand into his lap and leans into his side, pressing his smile against his ear. “You’re a loser,” he whispers fondly, giggling when Louis scoffs indignantly. 

Louis doesn’t argue, though, because they both know it isn’t true. Harry may think he’s lame, but Louis’s won the jackpot, and he’ll never not appreciate it. He still pouts up at Harry, though, sticks his bottom lip out and scrunches his nose, and Harry’s face gets all tight and squishy like it does when he’s trying not to pounce on Louis right then and there.

He leans in and kisses his pout away, sucking on Louis’s bottom lip until they’re both smiling. “You’re a loser,” he mutters again, smiling against Louis’s mouth. “But I love you anyway.”

Louis hums happily and melts back into the couch, bringing Harry down with him. He’s starting to get that feeling in his chest, the one he’s come to recognize as his heart rearranging all the love and adoration he has for Harry and making room for even more. It’s a common feeling for him at this point, and even now as they’re slowly being pulled away from each other by the world, Harry is always in Louis’s heart and he’s never getting out.

Harry is able to recognize it too, when Louis gets this way. He tugs Louis under his arm and chuckles, shifting so Louis can wrap his arms around his middle and hold him tight. 

“Again?” He whispers, eyes glinting when Louis looks up at him.

Louis bites his lip and nods, nuzzling into his chest. _Yes_ , he thinks, _I’m falling in love with you again._

Harry laughs again, quiet and rumbly, and presses a kiss to the top of Louis’s head. “Me too,” he murmurs, just for him.

Louis thinks his heart can’t possibly hold any more love, but there it goes again, stretching just a little bit wider. He aches with it, with all this emotion he has to keep under lock and key in daylight. He aches with it at night, though, too, aches when he’s pressed up against Harry in any capacity. It’s a good ache, the best kind of ache, one that starts in his toes and spreads up through his whole body, centered in his chest. He’s in love, fuck him, he’s constantly falling in love, and he’s never going to be able to stop.

-

There’s been a heat wave terrorizing LA for the past week and a half, which means Harry insists on keeping all of the windows closed and keeping the air con on full blast. He’s on a break from filming his movie and Louis has been blessedly able to be MIA for a while now, which means they’ve been holed up in their LA house the whole time. They so rarely see each other anymore, what with how busy they both are; Harry with reinventing his image and Louis with keeping up an image he doesn’t even want anymore.

It’s so exhausting, all of it. Louis has two very public relationships with women he doesn’t even know personally and quite frankly doesn’t want to know at all. He wouldn’t be doing any of this if he didn’t get to come out at the end of it, though, if he didn’t think he and Harry would finally be able to be free.

They’ve both had their fair share of meltdowns over the years, but they’ve always been able to come back from them. Louis feels like he’s on the precipice, though, like if one more little thing goes wrong he’s going to lose it and destroy absolutely everything, and there’ll be no coming back from it.

He’s tired. He’s just tired. He feels old and jaded and sad and he’s so fucking tired of everything he wonders sometimes if it’s even worth it.

He wakes up in his boxers without covers, shivering almost violently. He grumbles to himself as he rolls out of the bed, empty now without his body, and pulls on his comfy joggers and a t-shirt. He knocks the temperature on the thermostat down a few degrees just to spite Harry, and then makes his way downstairs.

It’s Sunday today, and they both have the whole day off. Harry’s in the kitchen making waffles when Louis finds his way in, humming quietly to himself. Louis is already sour, having woken up cold and lonely, and mixed with the perpetual state of grumpiness he’s found himself in lately, he thinks it’s best to just give Harry a slight nod when he turns to look at him and slips out the back door.

It’s not too terribly hot out yet when Louis shuffles onto the deck, so he chooses a chair in the sun and plops down. He hunches his shoulders in the way Harry hates, so maybe Harry will scold him if he comes outside. 

He lets his eyes fall closed for a bit, soaking in the sunlight. He wants to go home. He’s missed both Lottie’s and Fizzy’s birthdays and the twins just got new puppies that he desperately wants to play with and he misses his mum and he doesn’t really want this life anymore, he doesn’t think. He didn’t sign up for this, for the heartache and the sleepless nights and the months on end he goes without seeing the one person who makes this somewhat bearable.

The back door opens and then swings shut again, and then there’s a soft thump of a plate being set down on the table in front of him. The chair beside him scrapes against the wood deck and Louis finally opens his eyes, coming face to face with a plate of warm, perfectly cooked waffles.

Harry doesn’t say a word and Louis doesn’t really want him to, so he picks up the fork next to his plate and digs in. He hates when he gets like this, because he knows it makes Harry sad too, and the last thing he wants is for Harry to be sad. Harry only deserves the best things in life, and isn’t that why Louis’s doing any of this in the first place?

He eats two of the three waffles Harry gave him and then pushes his chair back, getting up and shuffling off the deck into the grass. He sheds his t-shirt as he goes, because it is getting quite hot now, and if Harry scolds him later for leaving it crumpled in the grass, well, Louis might be looking for a fight.

He heads over to the goal he has set up toward the back of the yard, just outside where the pool deck ends. There’s a multitude of footballs in the grass and Louis kicks at one of them, sending it rolling a few inches away from the net. 

With his hands stuffed in his pockets, he kicks the ball around aimlessly for a bit. He doesn’t know if Harry is still outside, if he’s watching him or not, but he doesn’t want to look. He keeps his head down and his eyes on the ball, relishing the way his toes twinge just a little when his bare foot collides with the plastic and the way his shoulders are starting to burn in the sun.

After what might be quite a while he winds up and kicks the ball as hard as he can, sending it soaring over the fence and into the woods off their property. He’s not upset about it, he has plenty, but he feels his hands ball up into fists at his sides and his jaw clenches a bit.

Before he can do anything else, though, a warm chest collides with his back and strong arms wrap around his chest, pinning his arms down. Harry uses the moves Liam taught him one time and gets one foot hooked around Louis’s ankle, pulling his foot out from under him and tackling him right to the ground.

Louis only has one available reaction; he screams. He shrieks and thrashes and kicks his legs as hard as he can, but Harry has him pinned, has had this attack planned for way longer than Louis’s been expecting it. He tries with all his might, even as Harry presses him steadily into the grass, and slowly, the fight melts out of him.

“There you go,” Harry breathes, sounding just as winded as Louis feels. “Shh, love.”

For an alarming, terrifying moment, Louis thinks he might be crying. He’s not, though, he’s just hiccuping and gasping dryly, pressing his own face into the ground.

“I hate you,” he spits, giving one more strong twitch. “Fuck you. Get _off_ , you fucking twat.”

“Shh,” Harry soothes. He’s used to the outbursts. Louis hates that he’s used to the outbursts. 

“I _hate_ you,” Louis says again, but with less venom this time. 

Harry nuzzles the back of his neck, and Louis’s muscles relax a little of their own accord. “No, you love me.”

“No I don’t,” Louis mumbles, limp, staying down as Harry releases him from the bear hug and rubs his hands up and down his sides.

Harry presses his face into the top of Louis’s spine and pouts, Louis can feel it. His fingers dig into the soft bits of his hips and Louis gasps his laughter, trying to curl into himself to escape Harry’s tickling.

They’re quiet for a bit when Harry relents, Harry laying flat on top of Louis in the grass. It’s hot and uncomfortable and there’s a disgusting amount of sweat building up between them, but Louis hopes they can stay like this for the rest of their natural lives.

Louis pushes against him after a bit, and Harry allows him to roll onto his back under him. Harry’s naked chest is hot when it presses against Louis’s, their noses barely an inch from touching. Louis gets an arm up to run his fingers through Harry’s short, silky hair. He’s still not used to it, but he likes it.

“I don’t hate you,” he mumbles, nearly a whisper.

Harry smiles down at him softly, eyes crossing just a bit. “I know.”

“You’re my best friend,” Louis breathes, knotting his fingers in Harry’s hair.

Harry smiles a little bigger, nuzzling their noses. “I know.”

Louis tilts his chin up minutely and Harry kisses him, his lips soft and warm and sweet like maple syrup. Louis licks the taste right out of his mouth and Harry lets him, holds his face gently and tangles their legs.

Louis is so suddenly overcome with love that it floors him, makes his muscles tense and his jaw drop. He breaks away from the kiss and shoves his face into Harry’s neck, getting his arms around Harry and digging his nails into his naked back. He can’t control himself, he’s so overwhelmed, he bites a little at Harry’s shoulder and whimpers when Harry laughs.

“You sap,” he chuckles, curling his fingers into the long hair at the base of Louis’s neck and pulling his head back. “It’s happening again, isn’t it?”

“Yes,” Louis hisses, rolling them over so he’s on top now. He kisses the breath out of Harry’s lungs, doesn’t pull away until Harry is actually gasping for air.

“You’re a loser,” Harry laughs breathlessly, beautifully.

“I can’t believe,” Louis pants, lips curling into a smile, “that I’m falling in love with you again.”

Harry grins at him, bright as the hot sun. “You’re going to fall in love with me again every day for the rest of your life, aren’t you?” He hums, but he sounds like he already knows the answer.

Louis kisses at his chest, right below his collarbone. “If you’ll let me,” he murmurs into his skin. They’ve been engaged for months now, but that’s a different story. 

Harry runs his fingertips up the length of Louis’s spine, and then down again when he shivers. “Always,” he says, confident, locking eyes with Louis when Louis peeks up at him.

Louis grins, his heart swelling again. He nips at Harry’s chest and Harry yelps, getting his arms around Louis again and sitting up quickly.

“No!” Louis shouts, already knowing what’s about to happen. He attempts to twist Harry’s nipple, but Harry’s already picking him up like he weighs nothing.

“You’re a menace,” Harry laughs, holding him tight even as he squirms.

“Harry, no!” Louis shrieks, but he’s laughing, eyes twinkling. “I have my phone, I have my-!”

Harry drops him into the pool rather unceremoniously, cutting off his argument quite fast. Louis swallows about a gallon of water and comes up coughing, grabbing the hand that Harry extends to help him out and pulling him right into the water as well.

Harry looks ridiculous when he surfaces, hair parted directly down the middle and flat against his head. Louis laughs so hard he swallows a little more water, and Harry helps him to the edge of the pool so they can hold onto the wall.

“It’s a good thing I love you, Styles,” he grumbles, shaking out his hair.

“Good thing,” Harry hums, waiting for Louis to sweep his wet hair out of his face before he slaps the water, sending a wave up and over Louis’s head.

When Louis stops spluttering Harry is already halfway across the pool, and Louis chases him without a second thought.

They end up back in the grass somehow, rolling around and making an absolute mess of themselves. Louis’s sweatpants are so heavy he feels like they might just fall off, but he’s smiling, laughing as he chases Harry around. The feeling hasn’t stopped, the one in his chest, and he hopes it never will.

He knows it never will.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading! 
> 
> if you liked the fic, you can reblog it [here](http://suspendrs-fics.tumblr.com/post/149192981127/fukcinglouis-falling-in-love-with-you-again-by), or you can [buy me a coffee](http://ko-fi.com/alyvia) :)
> 
> [faq](http://suspendrs-fics.tumblr.com/faq)


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